Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Lisa's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, July 27th, 2006
10:39 pm	Just about the kids Days go by so quickly...I always have so much I want to write about but never do.  I just wanted to update on each of my little ones. Alex:  He's just my silly Alex.  Today he got into my sock drawer and found my craziest pair of socks (they're striped and look like gloves, but they're made for feet...each large toe has a cat on it). So he excitedly ripped off his own socks and put on mine.  He then found a pair of my nylons.  Yes, he couldn't resist - he put them on (over the funky socks, mind you).  He had a blast running around the house.  I could only imagine if Keith came home, lol!   Alyssa:  How the heck did she get paranoid over lint and bees??  She will spot a bug - any bug - and scream, "A bee!  A beeeeeee!"  If I tell her it's not a bee, that it's a ladybug or a fly or cat hair, she will still remain horrified.  We were walking upstairs and she screamed...when I saw what she was upset over, it was cat hair.  I told her it was just cat hair, nothing to be scared of.  She yelled, "Oh no!  Cat hair!"  Everything is "ewwww, yucky".   Josh:  I am proud to announce that Josh is sleeping in his crib.  :)  I keep having flashbacks of when Alyssa was a baby and the hard time we had with getting her to sleep.  I just cannot get over how I can lay him in his crib and he will go to sleep.  Some nights it does take work...he will start fussing and it takes a couple tries to get him to go to sleep.  But he seems to actually enjoy his own space.   I took the kids to the park this morning.  Again I heard the comment that I'm getting so used to hearing:  "Boy you sure have your hands full."  Anyway, we were the only ones there at first.  Eventually the park was filled with kids of all ages.  It amazed me to see how different my two oldest are...Alex immediately jumped right in and introduced himself.  He made friends with two boys, one was 9 and one was 6.  And he kept meeting all the other kids.  By the time we left, he knew a little bit about each kid that was there.  Alyssa, on the other hand, paused when she saw other kids arriving.  She would stop and intently watch everyone.  Every now and then, she would glance over to make sure I was still nearby.  When she was sure that mommy was still nearby, she would carefully venture closer to the other kids.  I am so envious of Alex's ability to make friends so easily.  He has no shyness whatsoever.   Okay, better go park my buns in bed (haha, that sounds funny...gee I must be tired..).  Current Mood: sleepy (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 20th, 2006
11:19 am	A-ha! So that's why I felt so cruddy lately... AF is here!  Why am I so happy?  Because the past week, I've been experiencing pms but thought it was more post-partum depression.  It didn't even dawn on me.  I felt terrible - I wanted to be left alone yet felt very lonely.  Anywho, I'm feeling better now.  I haven't laughed in days, and today I'm feeling almost normal again.  The kids picked up on my better mood and were pretending that my arms were spaghetti noodles.  They kept smacking my head with my hands, lol! So I started out this week with the intent of having Josh sleep in his own room, in his own crib.  Monday night, I rocked him until he was drowsy and then placed him in his crib.  He did fine...he gave me that sleepy look and quickly dozed off.  I must say, he looks cute falling asleep with his binky.  I went downstairs, turned on the monitor, and found myself psychotically listening to it.  He slept for about 1/2 an hour before he started stirring.  I ran upstairs and checked on him.  He was sweaty because it was so hot upstairs.  I didn't have an extra fan to put in his room, so I chickened out and brought him back in our room.  He's been there the past two nights as well.   We just purchased a Tempur Pedic mattress.  It was a splurge for us, but we really needed a better mattress.  Because of Keith's bad back, we decided to go ahead and get one off of Ebay (yes, it is brand new, lol!).  We got it last week and I must say it is VERY comfortable!!  The only complaint I have is that it does seem to soak in some warmth from sleeping on it.  I love having a chilly room, which is impossible in the summertime.  Other than that, it's very nice.   Anyway, I had Josh in bed with me the past two nights.  He is too big for the bassinette.  Last night I had nightmares...the kind where you wake up and immediately check to see if your baby is breathing.  He was fine.  I think it's in my head that he's starting to roll and I need to be careful with having him next to me at night.  Gosh, the sweetest thing in the world is waking up in the middle of the night and seeing a tiny baby laying next to you.  It looked like he was pouting in his sleep, making him even more darn adorable. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 4th, 2006
8:39 pm	What the?! Where have I been? Good grief, I have been away from my journal far too long.   Today is the 4th of July.  My two oldest are with Keith's auntie and are probably having a blast.  We went to her house for a bbq and she asked if they could stay.  Alyssa is very shy around people, but loves Keith's aunt's boyfriend.  He seems to have a knack with her.   What have I been up to lately...sheesh, where do I start? First of all, I have stopped Zoloft.  Although it worked well for quite some time, I feel it's time to try another medicine.  Zoloft gave me a few side effects - those "sexual" side effects (aka "not wanting to be touched by your husband") and also made me clench my jaw while I slept.  So I am now on St. John's Wort.  I have been on it for about 2 weeks and am feeling a difference.  I talked to a pharmacist and he said that it usually takes about 3 weeks for the full effects.  So far, the only side effect I've felt is a sort of dizziness...sort like the the feeling of a roller coaster dropping.   We're getting more home projects done.  The cellar now is covered again.  Keith's dad re-did the cement ceiling.  We now have a raised cement slab on our front lawn.  Keith and I are putting a wood border around the edges.  It feels so nice to do things around the house and see results. The kiddos are doing great.  My little Josh is growing SO fast.  He's almost outgrown his infant carrier.  His smiles really melt my heart.  He grins from ear to ear and I feel like I'm on top of the world.   Mr. Alex has starting to change...he is starting to calm down.  He is not on meds right now.  The first few days off his medicine seemed to trigger some extra-rambunctiousness (is that even a word?).  Now, he's doing much better.   Alyssa is learning new things so fast.  I am happy to announce that she pee-pee'd in the potty last night!  (Boy, you know you're a mommy when you use words like "pee-pee'd").  I was thrilled.  I'm not going to push it though, just encourage her.  One thing Alex taught me was patience when it comes to potty training. A note to myself - the diet starts tomorrow!!!   Current Mood: full (Comment on this)
Sunday, June 25th, 2006
11:04 pm	testing test (Comment on this)
Friday, May 19th, 2006
9:22 pm	I have to write these things down before I forget Joshua update...My little guy is doing so good.  He is almost always happy and content.  While I was eating dinner, I had him in his carrier next to me.  He fell asleep.  When I was finished eating, I started saying his name.  He started grinning in his sleep.  My heart just fills with happiness when I am with him.  Every time I look at him, it seems that he had grown.  He has gorgeous blue eyes right now.  I wonder if they will stay that way or change as Alex and Alyssa's have.  He's so calm and easygoing.  Alyssa...What happened to my sweet girl?!  lol  Boy, she is definately going through her terrible two's.  She fights me and wants so bad to be independant.  I try to let her do things on her own, but sometimes it ends up in small disasters.  For example, she is very intent on putting on the lid on her sippy cup.  Even I have a hard time with those sometimes.  But she will sit her cup on the floor while holding the lid in her tiny hand and will struggle to put the lid on.  Most of the time, milk or juice ends up on the floor.  Ah, good thing Sydney is here to help with the clean-up.  Oh, she is learning so quick.  Alex and I will sometimes count things.  I noticed Alyssa quietly counting along with us.  She can count to 10!  And she has the cutest way of saying "seven".  She still is in love with the Wiggles.  She has recently become scared of bees.  Her definition of a bee includes anything that flies.  She was screaming, "A bee!  A bee!" over and over.  This alleged bee was actually a miniscule gnat. And last, but not least, my Alex...Still my ball of energy, but he is doing well in school.  I noticed that the medicine he's taking slows down his energy a bit, but he is still the same Alex.  He is such a good helper whenever I give him a specific task to do.  He absolutely loves helping me in the kitchen.  Today I was making pizza and he ran to the bathroom to wash his hands.  He helped me with the sauce and cheese.  He makes a mighty good pizza.  Outdoors, he likes to help me with my flowers.  He has his own set of gardening gloves.  Today I was watching him play and was amazed at how much he's grown.  Current Mood: happy (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 13th, 2006
4:24 pm	So strange Our house has a room that we didn't even know about.  We found it by accident today.  Our front lawn has a large concrete slab on it.  However, the top layer of cement was crumbling away and we wanted to do something about it.  Keith and I talked about taking out the cement slab and replacing it with brick.  So this morning Keith started chipping away at the concrete but soon realized it was thicker than we thought.  He rented a jackhammer and started breaking away the concrete.  The kids and I were watching from the front porch (which is enclosed).  Keith suddenly turned off the jackhammer...he saw a hole that led to a room.  He chipped away more of the concrete and we peered inside...it's a large room, about 10'x8'.   When we first moved in, we noticed that one of the walls in our basement had a piece of drywall covering something.  We assumed it led to a crawlspace to the front porch.  After finding this room, we opened that piece of drywall.  Our house had a root cellar and we didn't even know it.  Strange, huh?  I had no idea what a root cellar was until we started talking to some of our neighbors and relatives.  Apparently root cellars were used to store fruits and vegetables.  However, too much moisture has gotten to the cellar and there's mold.  It seems the previous owners tossed junk (old wood, bottles, even an old bedframe) and then just sealed it shut.   Keith decided to jackhammer the entire concrete slab.  We're going to seal the cellar shut (not really sure how yet!).  The scary part is that Keith parked his Silverado on it all the time, having no clue that he was parking over a cellar.   Anyway, that's our excitement for today. (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 4th, 2006
6:52 am	Down to one dog Well...I called the gentleman that got the puppies.  I asked him how they were doing and he told me they were doing great.  He recently lost his mule and noticed that his horse seemed depressed.  As soon as he brought the puppies home, they started running around with his horse.  He said his horse perked right up and he was so happy.  He's planning to give one of the puppies to his daughter.  Anyway, I told him that if he ever knew of anyone that could give Oliver a good home, let me know.  He said, "Which one was Oliver?"  (He had seen both Sydney and Oliver)  I told him he was the bulldog/pug, and he said, "Are you serious?  How much do you want for him?"  I told him I just wanted a good home for him.  He said he'd be right over.  He came over and was so excited.  He said, "Oliver will be my dog".  It was bittersweet - I really hated to give him away, but he went to a very good home.  After Oliver left, I gave Sydney a bath and brought her back inside.  She was happy.  I kept her in our bedroom last night.  She was a bit restless last night but seems to be doing just fine.  I love the feeling of having her indoors again. Current Mood: grateful (Comment on this)
Monday, May 1st, 2006
5:57 pm	Such a good visit I had such a wonderful visit with my parents!  I really hated to see them go...it seems like I count down the days until I see them again and each visit just flies by. My parents couldn't get over how Alex and Alyssa have grown.  And they were both in love with Josh.  I loved having my dad here - he helped me with some of the things around the house that I've been wanting to get done.  We chatted about how to redo our floors and how we might be able to get the staircase finished.  He helped me clean the front windows (I can see outside again!).  It was so comforting to have my mom around to talk to.  Each morning we'd wake up and find our way to the coffeemaker, then we'd sit down and just talk. The kids are doing good.  Josh is growing so fast!  His features are changing from that newborn look to a baby that's starting to fill out.   Alyssa is showing even more interest in potty training.  We started her on training pants, the cloth reuseable type.  She understands so much, but she just gets to the toilet a little too late.  She tried very hard today.  I'm not going to push it, I'll just let her lead the way.  She does love her new training pants though. Alex did something that took me off guard last week.  We were in a restaurant eating when he said he needed to use the bathroom.  I took him to the ladies' room and he stood there.  He refused to go inside.  He said that he was a boy and that he needed to use the boys' restroom.  All I could think was that I would not let him use the mens' room alone.  I told him that it was okay for him to use the ladies' room, because I was with him.  Reluctantly, he agreed.   As for me, I'm doing pretty good.  Each day it seems that things get into more of a routine.  I started doing a few house projects, mainly trying to restore the wood trim around the house.  It seems that someone decided to paint over the trimming (not the whole thing, just a sloppy paint job from the walls).  I'm stripping the paint and then applying polyurethane.   During my parents' visit, I put an ad in the paper for the puppies.  We got 18 calls the morning the ad came out.  The very first gentleman that arrived took both!  He was estatic - he and his wife just lost their dog because of a tumor.  He said the puppies were beautiful and that they would be kept inside.  He gave me his number in case I'd like to call to check up on them.  He also said that if we wanted to find a home for Oliver (our bulldog/pug, the puppies' father), please call him.  I just might do that.  He's a sweet dog but I cannot keep him in the house.  He doesn't know his own strength.   Anyway, that's my update for now.  Current Mood: accomplished (Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 19th, 2006
4:16 pm	My parenting skills are being tested... Today after picking up Alex from school, we had lunch.  Alex decided he wasn't very hungry, so I told him to put his lunch in the fridge and he could eat it later.  There are days when he comes home and eats everything in sight.  And there are days when he just isn't hungry until later.  Although I encourage him to eat, I never force him.  Anyway, he went back to the fridge a little bit later and said he wanted to finish his lunch.  I said that was good, I was happy that he wanted to eat.  He sat at the dining room table and sort of played with his food.  I went to the basement to get something and heard him calling for me.  When I came back upstairs, he said, "Look mom.  I ate everything."  I knew better than that (he had thrown scrambled eggs under the table once and did the same thing - told me he ate everything).  I looked under the table and sure enough...there was his lunch.  I looked at him and said, "Alex, what's under the table?"  He said, "I don't see anything."  I told him that I saw his lunch under the table.  He started to cry and ran upstais.  As he was running upstais he started saying, "I'm a stupid bad boy."  Now, I've taught him that the word "stupid" isn't something we use in our house.  He went in his room and I decided to let him cool down a bit while I cleaned up.   I went upstairs after a few minutes...I found him in his bed, crying.  I felt so bad.  I know he did something wrong but I feel so bad that he called himself a stupid bad boy.  I explained to him why it was wrong to put his food under the table.  I explained to him that if he's not hungry, he needs to let me know instead of hiding his food.  I'm not sure if I did the right thing...it didn't seem right to punish him because he felt so upset.  He said he hid the food because he wanted me to be proud of him for eating everything.   (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
9:32 pm	Doing really good Things have been going really, really well this week!  Keith had two tests today.  He's been stressed out about them for the past couple of weeks.  He called me this morning and I could tell from the tone of his voice that he passed.  I was so happy for him and proud of him.  He's been working very hard with this job.  It seems he does much better in a supervisor position.   The kids are doing great.  At Josh's last appointment, he was up to 10 lbs.  His little legs are getting some meat on them and I love it.  :)  He's been pretty gassy these past couple of day.  The other night he was very upset.  I could feel that his tummy was tight, so I gave him some gas drops.  I then put him on his belly and rubbed his back.  He dozed off and started farting like crazy!  He sounded like a grown man with those farts. Alyssa makes me laugh.  She enjoys unrolling the toilet paper from the roll.  I usually find a pile of toilet paper sitting on the floor whenever she sneaks in the bathroom.  I taught her how to roll it back up.  When she started doing it, I said, "Good girl."  Now she unrolls the toilet paper, then rolls it up and says "good girl" to herself in a sweet little voice. Alex sure is growing up fast.  He's going through a mom-don't-look-at-me-because-I'm-naked phase.  The other day he walked in on me getting out of the shower.  He apologized and then later said, "mom, I'm so sorry I saw you naked."  I can't believe he'll be 5 in just a few days.  I was watching videos of him today.  He was about 9 months old and still in that chubby baby phase.  I miss those days.  When he was a baby, I couldn't wait for him to reach the next step in his life - his first smile, crawling, his first steps...and now I wish that time went slower during those days.  I could cry just thinking about it. I've been having a HUGE appetite lately.  I remember going through this when I was nursing Alyssa too.  I can't seem to walk past the kitchen without thinking, "Hmmm...what can I eat right now?"  It's almost 10 pm and I just got done eating a giant bowl of Cheerios.   Well that's all for now.  Better get my buns in bed.  Alyssa has been getting up at around 6 am, so I better be prepared for her.  Current Mood: sleepy (Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 5th, 2006
1:37 pm	ZZzzzzzzzz I had a verrrry rough night on Monday night.  It started when I put Alyssa to bed.  I knew she wouldn't stay in her own room for long...she usually tries to sneak into bed with me.  I have a hard time sleeping knowing that she might come downstairs soon.  Anyway, I had Josh in the room with me.  Poor little guy - for some reason, he had a tough night.  He spit-up twice.  Both times resulted in me changing the bedding and his clothes.  It got in his nose and everything.  I finally got him settled, but he couldn't sleep.  He cried and cried for hours.  I tried nursing him, walking with him, giving him gas drops...nothing worked.  I must have gotten about an hour (total) of sleep.  Throughout the night, Alyssa kept walking into the room so I had to put her back in her room.  Alex even got up during the night.  I was so grouchy yesterday.  Last night was much, much better.  Josh woke up about 3 times to nurse but went back to sleep right away.  Alyssa did get up twice but I had no problem getting her back to her own room.  This morning I woke up just before the alarm clock.  Alex came in the room and said, "Mom, it snowed last night so I have no school today."  I thought he was pulling my leg until I looked outside and saw snow!  I checked my email and there was a 'school's out' alert for today.  So it felt nice to be lazy and not have to get dressed to pick him up from school.   Current Mood: awake (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 30th, 2006
5:30 pm	Life as a mommy to three I think the biggest change in my life is how fast my days go by now!  I feel like I wake up, only to turn around to get ready for bed again.  I must be turning into an old fogey - I actually look forward to bedtime because I'm usually so worn out.   Today was beautiful out!  I think it was almost 70 degrees.  I decided to rearrange the front porch.  I cleaned everything, then went inside to work on the kitchen ceiling.  (In case I forgot to write about it, Alyssa had left the water running upstairs one day.  The water seeped through our kitchen ceiling, discoloring it with lovely rings of yellow)  I painted the entire ceiling, plus patched up the spots that had lost texture because of the water damage. Let's see, an update on the kids...well, they're surviving, lol!  Alex went through some really strange changes while on his medicine.  We took him off the Adderall because he had started to get over-emotional.  I read on the internet that that can be a side effect.  He would start crying over everything.  Then he told me that there was a "squirrel in his head" that told him not to like me.  That scared the poop out of me, so I pulled him off the medicine.  We started Concerta, but never really got to see the effects because Alex started having a hard time swallowing the pills.  So we go back to the doctor on Monday to see what else we can do. Alyssa is doing very well.  Her top gums have healed and she can talk/sing/eat just like before.  I am seriously having a hard time keeping clothes on her right now.  As soon as I get her dressed, she immediately strips down to nothing.  I find her clothes strewn all over the place.  She does get very jealous over the baby.  I have to watch her around Josh because she doesn't really understand that he's fragile.  She loves to jump and play, and it makes me nervous when she does that near him. Josh is doing great too.  He is such a sweetheart.  I have a horrible confession to make.  When I was pregnant with him, I had a hard time bonding with him.  Being pregnant for the third time is so much different than the first two times.  The first times, I got to spend time talking and singing to my belly.  By the third pregnancy, I was so busy that there were days that I forgot I was pregnant!  Sounds crazy, but it's true.  Anyway, without the bonding, I felt so worried about how I'd feel once he would be born.  I knew in my heart I would love him, but I still worried.  Now that he's here...oh my gosh, I am in love with him.  I can't describe how much I love this little guy.  I can't get enough of him.  :)  I find myself "accidentally" waking him up just to spend more time with him.  He's a very content baby.  Throughout the night, he will nurse about 3-4 times, but goes back to sleep right away.  He's just a sweetie.  I love the way he stretches when he wakes up and how he smiles in his sleep.  I am so very, very lucky.  His jaundice seems to have cleared up.  He's still got a touch of a cold but is doing better. Anyway, I feel as though I'm healed from giving birth and having the tubal.  It's a very strange thought to know that I won't ever get to be pregnant again.  I don't know if I'm actually happy about that or not.  I know we're done having kids, but I really did enjoy each of my pregnancies.  I guess I feel a little sad that the "pregnancy" part of my life is now over.  But there's so much to look forward to - seeing my little ones grow up and spending time with them. I'm back on Zoloft.  The ob put me back on medicine almost right away because of my past experiences with post partum depression.  I feel pretty good, but some days I do feel blue.  I think that has a lot to do with Keith being gone.  I miss his so much when he's not here.  I love Fridays when he comes home and dread Sundays.  (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 16th, 2006
12:07 pm	Joshua Douglas is here! I thought I'd better write down Josh's birth story before I forget the details.  :) On Friday morning, we woke up at around 5 am to get ready to head to the hospital.  I was nervous the whole night.  I kept getting contractions, not sure if they were caused by nerves though.  We could already tell it was going to be a beautiful day - it was unusually warm outside and it felt nice.   We arrived right on time, but the induction didn't actually start until about 8 am.  The nurse started the pitocin at a low dose and I started getting contractions right away.  The pitocin was gradually increased until my contractions were about 2 - 3 minutes apart.  I must say...I kept waiting to be in horrific pain, but I wasn't!  My contractions felt like braxton hicks.  At around noon, I opted for an epidural.  I still wasn't in pain but knew that I wanted an epidural "just in case".  For the next hour or so, I didn't make much progress.  I kept dozing off and it seemed to slow down the contractions.  At around 3:30 pm, the doctor checked me again.  He said, "That's more like it, you're about 8 cm and the baby's head is very low."  He said I'd be ready to push in about 1/2 an hour, but within minutes I could feel my muscles tensing up (like my body was trying to push baby out without my consent, lol!).  I called the nurse back in the room and had her check me again.  She sort of rolled her eyes because I was just checked minutes ago, but sure enough...I was fully dialated and ready.   I pushed through about four contractions.  Josh arrived screaming and full of life!  His apgars were 9 and 10.  I was so excited to meet him.  I got to hold him right away.  It was a wonderful feeling to hold our little guy after wondering and waiting for all those months. Shortly after giving birth, I started to bleed heavily.  I was given a shot of something which helped control things.  Keith's parents were in the waiting room and got to meet baby Josh right away.   After an hour or so, I was prepped and ready to get the tubal done.  In the surgery room, I started to feel a panic attack coming on.  Originally, the surgery was to be done while I was awake.  However, as I was laying there, I heard the anethesiologist say, "She's panicking..."  I woke up in the recovery room, shivering and very groggy.  About an hour after surgery, I started getting feeling back into my legs and stomach area.  Suddenly, I realized I had to pee.  I had to pee like I've never had to pee before.  I told the nurse that I needed to, and she said, "Oh, it's probably just the epidural wearing off.  I'm sure you don't have to pee."  Um..excuse me?!  I finally convinced her that I did need to go.  She helped me to the toilet and stood there, watching me.  Now I don't mind my children in the bathroom while I do my business, but a complete stranger watching me does intimidate my bladder.  A small amount dribbled out, but I could still feel intense pain.  I asked her to please get a catheter.  She was so reluctant.  Anyway, to make a long story short, she finally got the catheter going and I peed a lot.  (I wanted to shout "Ha!  Told you I had to go!" lol) We were released from the hospital on Sunday.  It felt so nice to be back home, but a bit hectic.  Overall, the kids are all doing good.  Alex and Alyssa are adjusting to their new little brother.  Alex is great with him.  He really loves him and cares so much already.  Alyssa doesn't quite understand yet.  She gets frustrated if she can't sit on my lap or be picked up.  Slowly, she is learning.  Josh has jaundice right now but I believe it's going away.  He was awfully yellow yesterday but his bilirubin level was only 12.9.  I had him in the sunlight today and have been nursing him constantly.  He looks better this afternoon. I'm still a bit sore from the tubal, but am doing good with my recovery.  I didn't need stitches this time. I hate having Keith gone right now.  I think I'm doing okay, thanks to the help I've been getting from my in-laws.  I can't wait till he comes home tomorrow night.  :) (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 7th, 2006
2:09 pm	Cleaning like a maniac Oh my gosh, I am going nuts!!  I know it's a part of nesting, but I can't seem to stop.  This morning after Alyssa and I came home from the mall, I went downstairs to throw in a load of laundry.  I looked around and realized just how unorganized and dusty our basement is.  That set me off into a frenzy - I've spent the past couple of hours working down there.  The kids are cracking me up...they are 'helping' me and it's nice to have company while I'm down there.  We just took a break for an ice cream cone.  I think we all deserved one.  :) I'm getting so nervous.  Tomorrow is my due date, but I know from the past that that doesn't mean too much.  Last night I had lots of contractions (some woke me up they were so painful), but I knew they were false labor because they were not consistent.  I'm scheduled for an induction on Friday at 6:30 am.  At first my ob wanted to schedule it for Monday, but he bumped it up a few days because of Keith's schedule.  (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 5th, 2006
9:29 pm	Still here :) I haven't updated in a few days...I've been running around getting things done.  I seem to go in spurt of laziness and psychotic house cleaning.  This evening was one of those gotta-clean moods.  I have never had such a clean bathroom!  I scrubbed everything I possibly could.  Then I changed bedding.  I got laundry done.  I scrubbed the kitchen sink with bleach and got a bunch of trash ready for tomorrow's garbage pick-up.  I seem to do this strange cleaning right before Keith comes home and right before he leaves.   Right now the house is so quiet...Keith is gone, the kids are asleep, and the cats are locked in the basement (our cats get a little rambunctious at night.  Pete can sound like a grown man walking when he goes up/down the stairs).   As my due date approaches, I noticed I care less and less about my appearance.  I had to laugh at myself yesterday because I went to Wal-Mart in sweatpants, a gigantic t-shirt, and my hair in a bun.  Oh, and shoes that didn't match, but at least they were comfy.  I have a check-up tomorrow, complete with a lovely internal exam.  I'm anxious to see if I've made any progress in the last week.  This weekend I've had so much swelling in my feet and ankles.  My mood swings are horrific right now.  Alex is going through a funny stage right now.  He is making up all kinds of words.  He says something like, "Mom, that's just so klunsky."  He then will ask if that is a 'bad' word or not, while giggling and watching my face for a reaction.  Or if I ask him what he's hungry for, he'll say something like, "I think I want a roto-parley." He then bursts out laughing and laughing.  Or, for shock value, he'll say he's really craving eyeball soup.  Oh I almost forgot to mention...he has had to use Pull-Ups for nighttime since he was potty-trained.  He's a very sound sleeper, just like his daddy.  We've never made a big deal of him using them.  Anyway, for the past couple of weeks, he's been dry throughout the night and even wakes to use the potty.  I know he's almost 5, but this is a huge milestone for him.  Normally he sleeps so deep that I can turn on his bedroom light without him waking up.  We've even changed his clothes and he slept through it. Alyssa is doing so good!  Her surgery was very successful.  Her four front teeth (top ones) were pulled, she had two molar cavities filled, and she had a cavity between her lower teeth filled.  The surgery took about an hour.  She was very groggy after the anesthesia wore off, but did very well overall.  We've been keeping her on a diet of soft food and she seems to be doing fine.  We can gradually get her back to normal food in a few days.  The only time you can tell that she doesn't have her top teeth is when she gives a big smile.  She still is beautiful as ever...her toothless grins pull at my heart the same as before.  She still talks the same.  And she's showing more signs of potty-training too.  Whenever she's peed in her diaper, she gets fully undressed (not sure why she insists on being completely naked, even her socks have to come off), and hands me her diaper.  Also, whenever I need to use the bathroom, she follows me and loves to hand me toilet paper.  Funny, before I had kids I would have never guessed I'd let someone watch me use the toilet!  Sometimes I even say, "See?  Mommy is going potty.  This is where you can go potty too."  (should I even be admitting this? lol) Anyway, time to get ready for bed.  It's just so hard when I have some "me" time.  :) Current Mood: relaxed (Comment on this)
Friday, February 24th, 2006
8:36 am	After a bunch of phone calls yesterday... I got Alyssa's dental surgery bumped up to March 2nd instead of July-something.  She had been doing fine the night that she fell, but the next day (yesterday) she started showing signs of being in pain.  She ate some food and drank liquids, but tried to eat a small slice of apple and started crying.  She was upset at her apple (or "bapple", as she calls it).  I called Keith's aunt, who works at a dental office nearby.  She said it sounded like her tooth needed to be pulled...the pink part that I could see was definately an exposed nerve.  I called Alyssa's pediatric dentist to see what they could do.  They were very concerned.  The dentist said that if she cried constantly (which she wasn't, it's only if she tries to eat something solid), he would take her in tomorrow.  However, if we waited until March 2nd, we could get all four of her front teeth done at once.  Rather than have her put under anethesia twice, I opted to wait until next week to get her procedure done.  This morning she's eating yogurt and scrambled eggs without a problem.  She's able to drink without a problem.  I think as long as we stick to soft food for the next week, she will do just fine.  The dentist said to make sure she has a dose of Motrin before any big meals.  Oh, I had a doctor appointment yesterday.  I had my first internal check (I swear, it felt like the doctor was digging for gold up there).  I'm only 1cm, and baby's head is still fairly high.  I'm 38w2d as of today.  I had to break down and buy some althletic pants because I can't fit into any of my maternity jeans anymore (eeek!!).  I'm guessing this little guy will be content in my belly for a couple more weeks. Alex seemed to be doing really good this morning.  I'm hoping to talk to his teacher this afternoon.   I'm in such a good mood too - Keith comes home today   :)   Current Mood: bouncy (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006
10:31 pm	Feeling like the worst mommy in the entire world. I should be in bed sleeping right now, but I'm very upset.  Today was a hard day.  Alex was having an emotional day; everything seemed to upset him.  He cried over having to get dressed, because he didn't have enough stickers, because he wanted snacks instead of a meal, etc.  I finally snapped and yelled at him to stop crying.  I went into the bedroom to cool down.  I hate losing my temper...it makes me feel horrible and I'm sure it makes the kids feel just as bad.  Especially right now - with Keith being gone, it seems to affect us all.  I'm overwhelmed at times and the kids act up because they miss Daddy. Anyway, after I cooled down, I started to unload the dishwasher.  Alex came in the kitchen and wanted some strawberries.  I got him a bowl of berries and he headed into the dining room to eat them.  (I'm starting to cry again as I type this)  From the kitchen, I can see into the dining room.  Alex saw Alyssa in his chair.  He yelled at her to get off his seat.  She was standing on the chair and was facing him.  I told Alex I would come get her off his seat, but I couldn't reach them in time...he pulled her by her shirt and she fell flat on her face.  She fell right onto her front teeth.  I screamed...she was crying so hard that she couldn't breathe.  I could see right into her mouth and saw that her front tooth was now almost gone.  She started to breathe again and was running her tongue on her teeth - obviously she felt that her tooth was broken.  I saw a piece of her tooth laying on the floor.  I think I screamed again, I ran to the living room with her in my arms.  Meanwhile, the whole incident scared Alex and he started to cry hysterically.  I yelled at him.  I yelled very, very loud.  I was so upset at what just happened.  I called my in-law's house...honestly, I needed help.  Alyssa's tooth is now broken and I can see the pulp part in the middle (as least I'm assuming that's what it is?  I can see a pink center in the part that's left).  I had both my kids crying as well as myself.  My sister-in-law answered the phone and said she'd be right over.  I called Keith in the meantime, I needed to calm down.   Anyway, my sister-in-law (whose name is also Lisa) came over and helped me get the kids calmed down.  It really helped to have her here.  She helped me get dinner ready and get the kids into their bath and ready for bed.  She really is a sweet person.  She's only about 17 but is very mature and very caring.  She didn't leave until everything was completely settled.  I was able to talk to her and vent a little bit.   I keep seeing flashbacks of Alyssa falling on her face.  I can't get that image out of my head right now. All my life I've wanted to be a mom.  As long as I can remember.  And after having four miscarriages, I thought that dream would never become a reality.  Somehow we were blessed with our son, our daughter, and now our third baby.  Why am I having such a tough time??  I am so envious of other moms who seem to have everything under control.  I feel like I'm struggling right now.  I know part of this has to do with being pregnant...at this point, I'm physically unable to do most of the things I normally do.  I'm used to toting around Alyssa with no problem, picking up Alex to wrestle with him, handling household chores without a problem.  I'm pretty sure my hormones are raging.  I know part of this also has to do with being alone most of the week.  But I am nervous about being a mom to three little ones.  How can something that I've always hoped and wished for also be something that I feel like I'm failing at?  I should be enjoying motherhood...instead, I'm irritable and grouchy. Such a downer of an entry.  I'm exhausted right now but just felt that I needed to write a bit.   Current Mood: sad (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 21st, 2006
8:23 am	Just waiting on baby It feels so funny to be so close to my due date.  I know it's still early, but yesterday I felt a strange crampy feeling.  I kept thinking it can't be labor...but what if?  It prompted me to pack my hospital bag (yes, I still hadn't done it!), just in case.  Today, however, I'm feeling fine.  I remember this happening with Alex and Alyssa...my body tricked me several times into thinking I was going into labor.   Alex really cracks me up sometimes.  The other day he asked, "Mom, how is the baby going to get out of your tummy?"  I'm pretty sure I gave him that deer-in-the-headlight look, but I said, "The doctor will help me get him out."  I expected more questions, but he was satisfied with that answer.  He also informed me that he was going to marry both me and Alyssa when he grows up.  He said, "Mom, you married Dad because you really love him.  That means I'm going to marry you and Alyssa when I get bigger."  It's so funny to hear what kids come up with. Alyssa's new saying is, "I want that!".  She can identify all kinds of shapes already.  I was surprised...one night I was drawing on her MagnaDoodle.  I made hearts, squares, stars, circles, and triangles.  I pointed to each shape and said it's name.  The next day, she handed me her MagnaDoodle.  I drew the same shapes.  She pointed to each one and said it's name.  She had a tough time saying triangle, but she made such a good attempt.   Hmmm...I spoke too soon.  I'm feeling crampy again. I know I've mentioned here over and over about how Alyssa still cosleeps with us.  Since her room has been finished, we decided to try and put her in her big girl bed.  We did it for a couple of nights, but then I resorted back to the sofa bed when she was sick.  For the last two nights, I've put her back in her room.  Being the paranoid mommy that I am, I decided to sleep on the inflatable mattress on her floor, just in case she gets too restless and gets out of bed.  The upstairs is kind of strange - at the top of the staircase, you have to 'step' up into Alyssa's room.  I am so worried that she'll get out of bed, get confused, and will fall down the stairs.  Anyway, I plan to camp out in her room for another night.  Then I'll move the mattress to the baby's room and sleep there for a few nights.  Eventually I hope to make it back to our very own bed, lol! Okay, time to get off my butt and head for the shower.  Current Mood: mellow (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, February 16th, 2006
4:01 pm	What do you mean, I have less than three weeks?! I can't believe I'm down to just three weeks until the baby's due date.  I'm happy, nervous, excited...I feel ready one minute and not ready the next.  I guess because I'm physically worn right now, it's hard to imagine caring for another little one.  But every time I look at something of his, I get so anxious that I can hardly stand it.  My appointment went well yesterday.  I was tested for Strep B and anemia.  Baby's heartbeat sounded good and I'm still measuring on track.  I believe I'll get an internal next week.  Believe it or not, I'm looking forward to that because I'm curious if anything is going on down there! This past week I've been quite busy.  I've finished baby's room, I've bought most of the newborn things we'll need, plus the "good stuff" for after delivery.  I must say, I was pretty clueless after having Alex.  I never knew that I was going to need those super-sized pads that could easily mimic a twin-sized mattress.  Never knew that Tucks pads could offer such relief.  And it never crossed my mind that I might need to buy nursing pads because my boobs had a mind of their own (I'll never forget my first trip to the store by myself...I ran out to get something and heard a newborn crying somewhere.  My boobs instantly reacted by leaking all over my shirt.  I stood there in the store, horrified).   Alyssa had another consultation with a different dentist yesterday.  This pediatric dentist is about an hour away.  I packed a bunch of things for the kids to do to keep them busy on the car ride.  When we got there, I was a little surprised at the doctor's office - it was located in sort of a business-type building.  There was a mixture of offices...everything from lawyers to insurance companies.  There was even a little craft store inside.  Anyway, the visit went well.  I really, really liked the dentist.  He took a look at Alyssa's teeth and said that it appeared her enamel never formed strong, it was very weak.  He said that he does most of his work in hospitals nearby.  He explained that she would be put to sleep, in a hospital, by an anesthesiologist (sp), and would be monitored closely.  Her airway will be kept open during the procedure.  He also thinks her two larger front teeth can be saved, but the smaller ones (which are almost gone) will need to be pulled.  I have to say, Alex did wonderful during the appointment.  He sat in his chair, with his box of goodies (paper, crayons, tape, etc).  He made a picture for the dentist.   Keith comes home tomorrow  :)  :)  :)  (yes, that did require three smilies, I've really missed him!).  Current Mood: excited (Comment on this)
Sunday, February 12th, 2006
9:55 pm	Update on Alex I've got a good update.  :)  Alex had his appointment a few days ago.  I turned in the paperwork to the nurse.  The doctor came in shortly after and we discussed putting Alex on medicine.  She wanted to start him on a low dose of Adderall.  I love this peditrician - I was able to ask all kinds of questions and I would get straight answers.  Anyway, I went to the pharmacy after the appointment and filled the prescription.  When Keith called that night, I told him about the appointment.  He asked that I not tell Alex's teacher about the medication.  He had his reasons why and I would like to respect that.  We decided to start the medicine on Saturday, since we'd both be home to monitor any side effects.  I'm always nervous whenever one of us starts a new medicine, even over-the-counter.  You just never know. Anyway, I cannot begin to explain the changes.  At around noon, Alex asked to have some paper and his scissors.  He sat there, cutting paper hearts for the longest time.  He wrote his name on each heart, making one for each person he could think of.  Throughout the day, he was able to complete simple tasks that are normally challenging to him (fastening buttons/zippers, putting on his shoes, sharing with Alyssa).  He made several comments about how he was being a good boy.  I was able to have several conversations with him without him getting frustrated...there have been so many times in the past when he's stopped in mid-sentence and said, "Mom, I'm trying to tell you something" while hitting his head with the palm of his hand (he gets frustrated when he can't get his thoughts out completely).  The best part, is that he was still himself, just a calmed-down version.  I did notice that his appetite wasn't as strong as it normally is.  I kept asking him if he wanted a snack or drink.  He did eat well at mealtimes though.  He is so excited about Valentine's Day.  I told him that on Monday night we will sign cards for each of his classmates and he's looking forward to that.  Keith left tonight.  This was a rough weekend between the two of us.  We got a letter on Friday from the government, saying that we were over-compensated for our military move in 2004 (from WA to MD).  I was so upset...I took it all out on him.  I kept asking him why he didn't know what our weight limit was.  Apparently our weight was so over-limit, we were almost twice the allowed amount.  I'm also going through that nesting stage.  I want everything done, right now!  It's frustrating to have Keith home only for a short time because I have so much that needs to get done.  Okay, time to get to bed.  Current Mood: tired (1 Comment |Comment on this)